Eye View 

by David Charbonneau


Same-sex couples might restore shine to tarnished institution
August 19, 2003
Kamloops Daily News


The reputation of marriage is being ruined by a small group 
of people.  It's already on shaky ground when you consider  
that one-half of all marriages end up in divorce.                               

But even those doomed marriages begin with good intentions.
They start with love in their hearts but infidelity,
infirmity, and incompatibility take their toll. Despite
solemn vows in which they publicly declare they will "have
and hold each other until death do them part," they end up
divorced.
   
No, it's not those men and women who are ruining marriage
even though they will eventually fail at it.  Rather, it's
those who start off with bad intentions that are doing the
most damage.

Consider, for example, the debacle of 50 women assembled in
the "wedding capital of the world," Las Vegas, to win a
brand-new multimillionaire husband that they have  never
laid eyes upon before.

Their motivation was greed, not love.  They were eager to
make a mockery of marriage for money on the TV show "Who
Wants to Marry a Multi-Millionaire?". Darva Conger, a nurse
from Ventura, California, was the "winner" of this farce.
She was happily married to comedian Rick Rockwell for a
whole two weeks before the marriage was annulled.

"I'm a Christian woman. If I'm not married in a church with
a preacher, I am not married before God, and I am not
married in my heart," said the hypocritical Conger as she
grabbed the money and later posed for Playboy magazine.

Modern marriage is taken so lightly by many men and women
it's hard to understand how some religious groups and
political parties are so infuriated by the prospect of
same-sex marriages.

Same-sex marriages may actually improve the reputation of
marriage, if the first couple under Ontario's new law is any
indication.  Michael Leshner and Michael Stark tied the knot
as soon as they legally could.

Michael and Michael had been preparing for this day for
years.  It was a modest ceremony with 50 people in
attendance.  The groom and groom wore the same dark suits
and white shirts with ties.  "When we get married, we will
have lit a match that hopefully illuminates the world," said
Lesher, as they toasted their marriage with champagne on the
steps of the church.

Marriage is a cornerstone of our society.  It provides
social stability with a public declaration of the love that
two people have for each other.  Marriage should not be
entered into greedily or frivolously.

Marriage can also be a declaration before God - - a vow
taken to adhere to the tenets of religion.  Religious
practitioners object to same-sex marriages because they say
that homosexuality is a sin.  They say that the Bible is
quite clear about it. "Thou shalt not lie with mankind, as
with womankind: it is abomination (Leviticus 18:22).

But same-sex couples can have strong religious views and
apparently they read the same Bible.  One explanation for
this difference of opinion is that there are actually quite
a few "abominations" in old testament that modern Christians
regard as unimportant - - such as the eating of eels and
ospreys and sacrificed animals after the third day.  In that
light, homosexuality is not a sin at all.

For some Christians, there is no religious basis for
objecting to same-sex marriages.  "In Sunday school, I was
taught that God created everything and loves his children,
no matter what," says Nicole Matus (The Daily News, July
10).  Matus argues that same-sex marriages must please God
because he created people that way.

She also has some trouble with the evil of heterosexual
couples who "starve their children, beat them to death, and
sell them to prostitution rings."   While the religious
objection to same-sex marriages are misguided, at least they
are understandable.

What's puzzling are the political objections raised by the
Canadian Alliance Party.  They lamely argue that parliament
should have debated same-sex marriages instead of letting
the Supreme Court of Ontario decide.

To test the Alliance's argument, substitute "gun control"
for "same sex marriage."  The Alliance wishes that the Gun
Supreme Court would rule that gun control is
unconstitutional so that parliament would rescind it.
Parliament debated and approved gun control.

If all heterosexual couples went through the same scrutiny
as same-sex couples, marriage might have a better
reputation.  Where is the outrage at the damage to marriage
caused by opposite-sex marriage?

go back to my Columns in the Kamloops Daily News